Not just a pain in the arse...........

Sorry, not much going in here for a while, hurt my back you see, believe it or not, bending over in the shower.......So immature, grow up, NOT like that, not in a prison way!!!!....I was reaching for the soap....No, it wasn't like that....Stop it......It, was for the shower gel, for some reason, I want to smell like a butternut squash with a hint of mint and I also want to moisturise, no I fooking don't, I want to smell manly, I want to smell, like - hmmmmm, like, like - hmmmm, don't know, but it has to be manly, not sweaty or anything daft, a smell where the chicks go "ooohhhh" and their hearts skip a beat, don't want them skipping to many, but one will do, not to hard to ask, I bet Mel Gibson smells nice, he looks clean.....*Grrr become man again, build fire, grrrr* but, when you live with a bird and you don't go shopping what can you do, if she wants to smell like a butternut squash with a hint of mint, then so fooking be it, so do I.....

So, yes foooked my back, went to work, then ouch, it just went, in my job I have to escort people around, sounds all cool (if you're a bit weird) but it aint, believe me, all I have to do is escort them to and from the car park...... But, this particular day when I stood it was like a shooting pain in my left leg, it took several seconds before I was able to walk and when I did, it looked like I'd shate myself, not very dignified, not cool at all, it's even more embarrassing, when the people in question are arthritic pensioners with a zimmerframe and they are moving with more grace and a lot quicker than you, a rufty tuffty security guard, I lasted a couple of hours but had to phone the orifice and explain the situation to them and, as ever the little darlings were sympathetic and understanding it took 6 and a half hours to rescue you me........(Then, on Saturday I receive a letter asking me to attend a meeting in the office, so they can consider my suitability for the job and for the site - tosssssssersssss!!!! - Update - had meeting have been given a verbal warning !!!!!! - Again T-O-S-S-E-R-S!!!!!!!)

The missus picked me up, and for once, no shopping but we did swing by the bank, and then back at the old ranch, rest and recoup for me (fair shout to her being 9 and half months pregnant she done well, I'm not the worlds best patient, apparently I'm a pain in the foooking arse and a tosser!!!!! my missus, ain't one to mince her words !!!!!)........ I must admit, I was in a lot of pain, imagine a really hot day and you could murder a pint, or a glass of wine, you can see the beer, the frosty glass, the rivulet of ice gently sliding down the side, the bubbles sparking in the golden liquid, as they race to the top to join their mates in the frothy head time stands still, you reach out to grab the glass - to find you ain't got no hands, so you dip your head, you try to pucker up and take that first gulp of nectar - but your lips have been welded shut by an angry welder you owe money to, you try to snort the beverarge, but alas your nose has changed into an eye, imagine how much pain you'll be in because you can't take that swig....Well, triple it, oh yes I'm a foooooking doubley hard bastard me. I was, in that much pain and i didn't even cry.....Well not much..... So yes, pain, a lot off, rested for the remainder of the day and the next, thought things were going great guns then fooooking ba jeezus fooking h Christ in fook, couldn't hardly move, the missus phoned the quack and off we went in the bluemobile......

I hate the doctors, full of sick people all coughing and sneezing spluttering their germs, they're all trying to guess what's wrong with you, some even make conversation, what the fook???? This old gran starts telling me what's wrong with her, I don't mind this, don't like it, but will tolerate, a fooking humanitarian me, but, she was about an inch from my face, shouting, her breath, my god, I think she had been eating shite for breakfast, dinner and tea, then with her shitty stick, brushed her teeth, with, yes you guessed it, shite paste the paste for that browny looking smile, "its me eyes" she said "and my knee", "my backs a bit dodgy in all" (all I could focus on was this goober hanging from a very hairy nostril) "and as for this cough", she demonstrated what a cough it was, right in me fooking mush, the dozy bint should have gave her a jab then and there, but, not with this back, she would have kicked my arse, she then asks what am I in for, the fooking necky bitch, don't even know her and she's asking shit like that, I tell her I'm her to see if the sex change has been 100 % successful, then I describe to her how my penis fell off in Tescos in the frozen section and how concerned i was that the operation wasn't a full success, she looks me in the eyes and said........ My stools have been a bit runny!!!!!!....What the foook!!!!! She wasn't even listening - I tell her my penis has fell off and she's whittering on about how her turds are a bit runny.........Surely my fake illness out weighs hers.....

At last, my name is called, in I go leaving halitosis Harriet with the runny poo talking to some other poor bastard....The first thing the doc said was "you're a fat lad aren't ya pop on the scales" then does my blood pressure (which is fine) tells me I need to diet (look how it's spelt DIE - t fook off nothing good comes from a word with DIE in....) I explain I'm big boned, not convinced, so I ask her, being over weight is the main reason that my back went, is it? "Yes" fooking hell I bet if they found a fat lad on the fooking titanic he'll get the blame, it wasn't the ice berg old bunter there moved to the front of the boat......So yes, overweight people are in danger, when they ban smoking 100%, and they will, it'll be the fat fucks turn to get the blame for putting the NHS under so much, there'll be a fat tax ..........I'm going off on one (I have another blog something about a bitch, a place for me to moan, so I'll leave my moaning for there.......)

Back to the story.....

So yes, I'm a fat fook that's why I pulled a muscle in my back, nothing to do with it being early in the morning and me just pulling a muscle oh no...... She asked me to drop my shorts and for some reason she turned her back to give me some privacy.....Why???...She's gonna see me in my boxers, what the fuck, (I bet they see all sorts of sights in these rooms, shudder to think) but she might as well have a goosy gander, I might have put a show on for her, twerling my shorts above me head, woooping, couldn't gyrate a lot, bad back you see, so on the table I go, then she starts pulling and poking my legs, bend this way, bend that way, she must have caught a glimpse off little bishop, so why turn the back, the woman's a fool I tell ya........

Pop my shorts back on, just about to sit down when she tells me again I'm a fat git (fook me my missus tells me that don't need some stranger telling me as well) then as I thank her for the insults and tell her we must meet for drinks and she can call me even more names, what about bouncing bishop fatty pants or something, I start to leave, she says I pulled a muscle, foooking hell just now being a porker, I ain't got any muscles now, I've pulled one, told ya, the woman's a fool..... HH is still babbling on to some other poor sod in the reception I bet she ain't got an appointment bet she sits there day in day out telling people about her woes..... The missus is outside waiting for me, I explain what the doctor has said, that I'm a fat git and I've pulled a muscle just have to rest 7 - 10 days off home we go.....

I phone the orifice to explain the situation I offer to come in as its a bank holiday if they can provide taxis over the weekend as they might not be able to get cover they refuse which is fair comment they have cover I'm surplus to requirements I decide to have a bath, you have to clean yourself after talking to them and boy did that do the fooooking trick if you have a bad back take a dip *medical disclaimer if it foooks yous back more don't blame me, seek medical advice*

During my soak I had a visit from Jess, then Shannon and then the missus, then they all came in, Ally had this yellowy red rusty tin in her hand and looked all chuffed with herself, try this "fiery jack" my mum swears by it she beamed, after drying myself I applied loads of this orangey shite to my back and part of my arse then I looked at the tin, on the lid a faded 2d price tag looked and laughed at me, ooohhh fooook, turning the tin on the back, between the rusty bits, faded writhing, it read apply sparingly, ohhhh foooook, *memo to myself read the foooooking instructions FIRST arsehooooole* went for a pee, then scratched my, well, picked my nose, well had a good ol' rummage......Washed my hands..... About 10 minutes later nothing, half hour still nothing, fooking thing ain't working I thought, then a gentle tingling - ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!! Hot, fooooking hot, bastarding hot in fact...Shite shite shite...... My nose burst into flames my little winky shriveled and hid, all these nutters pay thousands to have sex changes all they have to do is apply fiery jack to the dangly bits and, my arse, foooking hell, it felt as though I was rogered by a cacti wearing a razor wire bra and panties.....Now the thing with an oilnment is, it soaks into your skin, you cannot wipe, rub nor can you wash it off, when it's there, it's there for the duration you apply a lot, it fooking hurts a lot... My missus came into the front room "whats up" she asked i lifted my top and fooooking hell it looked i'd been slapped with a wet kipper the hairs were singed the skin bubbled it foooking hurt the good thing was my back didn't hurt anymore........

No fooking around......

I just wanted to say a big thank you to everyone - all three of you !!!!! - for reading my blog, your comments have been really kind and to be honest unexpected, I'm really enjoying it at the moment and will continue to do so for the time being.....

I hope you all the very best and hope you all have a very good day.

Ps I'm unsure of the etiquette on these things so if I do anything wrong please let me know....

Have a very good day

I have some disturbing news for everyone...

Freddy the frog is no longer....... This morning at 07:30 upon entering the girls room, Freddy lay in a pool of his own stuffing, white fluff was everywhere and in a devistating twist Ms Jessica was the main suspect......

She had the frog for 2 years and now in some bitter twisted fight, Freddy lies in a heap disemboweled and unloved, Shannon was behind bars at the time but we suspect, she had something to do with this henus crime....

Whilst both girls remain silent the evidence is stacking up the most notable is the amount of fluff found in Jessicas bed, in her hair and some was even found in her mouth.... Shannon although as stated was behind bars we suspect she was the instagator or, at the very least, a witness.... A witness that could have stopped this terrible crime occuring.....

Our thought are with Freddys wife Freddena.......

When a big pizza pee hits you square on the knee that's ammonia...................

Finished work at 23:00, by the time I got home, it was around half eleven, started to do some E-mails then off to bed. I could hear the little uns disturbing so, finished up early to deal with them....

Shannon, is led, in her cot, her little dark hand clutching a white fluffy dog, her body, covered in a pink babygrow, she is laying sideways, her little black fluffy head is pressed against the wooden bars, "ahhhh bless" I lift her gently and place her in a sleeping position, kiss two of my fingers and place them lovingly on her brow, I look at Jess, her bed is covered in books and cuddly toys, she has a Minnie mouse, under her arm, she's an angel sleeping the sleep of the innocent.....

I climbed into bed, the missus arm starts flying around trying to seek me out, hits me, "just wanted toooooo............. " *snore* zzzzzzz she pokes me in the eye, then she lays some z'eds, "ah love her she wanted to say hi before going to sleep". I climb under the duvet, finding that only half of me is covered, no matter, it's not that cold..............

About, 2 hours later, Shannon is starting to disturb, I go in, one of her little legs are out of the babygrow, "bless", I climb back in bed, the missus has taken residence on my side of the bed, fine.

Half hour later, Jess is crying out, I go in she's sound asleep just mumbling in her sleep..."hmmmmmm"....

A hour later, Shannons off, I go in, she's lay on her front, sideways, arse in the air ..."Stupid bint" I think with a smile. I turn her again.....

Ten minutes, she's off again, in I go with a stomp, the stench of shite hits me like a baseball bat - urrrggghhhh, my eyes are burning, my lungs collapse, what the fuck as she been eating!!!!!.....But, she's asleep, so decision time, do I change her now and risk waking her and her sister or, do I wait and hope, she'll sleep, she seems to enjoy the sensation of a pooy nappy.....

I climb back in bed, no duvet, her fooking big arm smashes the side of my face, "for fuuuuuuuccckkkkk sakkkke" I scream in my mind, I grab the duvet and give it a yank, hard, just as I do, she fooks off to the toilet, I end up in a pile on the floor, wrapped in a fooking duvet, by the time I unscramble myself, I'm a ball of sweat, the missus returns, I'm too hot for the duvet. I'm wide awake my bum is hurting and, I'm in a piss...... I lay down think of some zzzzzzzzz. I'm gone..... My bare, hairy white arse hasn't got time to freeze......

Five seconds later Shannons crying, I go in, the smell has engulfed the room, I can't see anything, my eyes are full of tears, my nose has committed suicide, I'm going to die in here, I go outside, take a deep breath, visualize in my mind what I have to do, then exhale, gulp the air back in my lungs, then go for it........

Upon entering the room, in one fluid motion, I scoop Shannon up and make my way to the changing table, stepping over, around and even on toys, luckily none has gone off, I place her on the towel, which is on top of the table, her dark eyes glisten in the little light there is, they are wide open in the gloom, I undo her babygrow WOW the fucking smell has intensified, a lime green, toxic vapor cloud engulfs me, the air is thick, my flesh starts to flake, I undo her vest, now for the tricky part, the removal of the nappy.......

Oh foook, this clay like substance, has molded itself on her butt cheeks, I fumble for the wet wipes, I pull the tissue out. One solitary wet wipe, it's not even moist, I attempt, to wipe her, but it's like rubbing a wart off a hippo, it's not gonna happen....

As, the whole situation starts to deteriorate fast, Shannon decides to do a little dance, feet and legs are kicking the shit filled nappy, my worst nightmares are coming true, I scramble to find something, anything, the first thing to hand is her pink jiggly pop....Can't wipe her arse with this..... I give it to her to play with, her legs stop, she cuddles the jiggley pop and giggles its springy antenna find her mouth....I have brought myself some time, I find a sock placing this on my hand I pick and scrub her fleshy behind in the light I can't see if it's clean without thinking I bend still can't see I bend closer..................... fffffffffffffffffffffeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrppppp!!!!!!!.....She farts in my face, I can taste it, and people, itain't apple pie...

I drench her in talc, clean arse or not, she's done, I place a clean nappy, do the poppers on her vest and babygrow, redo the poppers on her baby grow, as I've several left over and then redo them, foooking things taking the piss now, "leave it", my brain screams, can't t-a-k-e, much, more, but it's personal....I have to succeed

Eventually I manage to redo the poppers I grab the nappy with the sock monster and put them both in a bag then picking Shannon from the mat she looks at me her big brown eyes heavy with sleep start to close jiggly pop is left behind and she puts her tiny little hands around my neck and cuddles in.........Being a dad......


Foooking rocks.

Leaky leakerson............

Last week, I had 5 days off, and after going to the seaside, I decided to drain the heating system in the house, I think it was a Friday, the missus was at work and the good weather is well and truly on it's way, so, I'll flush the heating system and get rid off any major turds, that's in the system as it were, pulled up a floor board, attached the hose, undone the drain cock ..... Nothing. Turned the heating on, nothing, opened an air vent, nothing, oh shitty pooh, what's going on.

Started to undo the drain cock, whooooosh, a shed load, of dirty, black water came gushing out. "FUCK it fuck it and double fuck it some more" I cried........In the front room, a little voice echoed "fuck it da" ..... Kids, are natures tape recorders....Remember this people.....Running into the front room, Jess is sat there, brushing a dolls hair, "fuck it", "no love dad said - blanket" ...She wasn't convinced "fuck it fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck da" ....... "No no bollocks"....."Bollocks da"...... *mumbles*Fuck shit grrr fuuuurr.....Bugger, is this swear word???...."Fuck da, bollocks da"......I'm getting nowhere fast here, and the house is still filling with water, luckily enough, it's under the floorboards, so, we now have a underground swimming pool, which the missus would love, I'm not 100% convinced of this, popping the T.V (television not....Well you know a tranny) on and turning it to the childrens channel, I run back to the waterfall..... Panic, starts to sink into me, can't turn the water off - "the wheels on the bus" reverberate through my head, bloody kiddie T.V.... Try to think, try to concentrate, "the bell on the bus...." Ping......I run upstairs (now, for a fat lad, all this running is not good him) I hunt in my tool kit and find a hose connector, jump down the stairs, avoiding the gaping hole in the floor boards, push the connector on the hose, then screw into the vacant end, the hose is already outside, I take a gander, nowt, nothing, nada, nicht - "the children on the bus go....." My heads going to pop, blue veins are dancing around my head.... I peer into the abyss, bloody hose is kinked, unkink it, water is flowing OUTSIDE, oh the joy, the birds are singing, the sun has its hat on and the wheels on the frigging bus, are still going around but, who gives a shit, the water is flowing.

I check the drain cock, all is working. I wash it through, still ok, hmmm, I check the rubber plunger type thing, aaha problem solved - "the women on the bus go chatter....." I'm humming the wheel on the bus now, I get, a little screw driver, gentle coax out the plunger - nothing, try a little harder - the fucking thing crumbles, the screwdriver stabs my hand, claret everywhere - "FUCK" - "fuck da" -"Noooooo" I grab, a bag of chocolate buttons and go into the front room, Jess and Shannon are sat watching some fat geezer called Justin (hehehehe just in !!!) do the sign for lion, "Roar" he says mimicking the lion, I give the girls a handful of buttons and neck the rest, no more swearing I tell Jess, slightly hypercritical but my kids my rules....

Hand is throbbing, the suns, fucked off in to get his coat, my vain, is now dancing, the riverdance, in steely dan boots, Justin, the nobber, is still, prancing around, "lion roar." I look at the rubbery crumbs on the sideboard, can i stick them together, can I heck like, option, options, options, what frigging options, I horse a load of PTFE tape around the brass plunger and around the screw part and wait until the system has drained, four hours later....... I screw the drain cock into the pipework, tight, tighter, a little more, now leave it......

As the time was knocking on, I decided, enough was enough, I'll pack away, get the kids, their tea, bath 'em, finish the washing up, ready for the missus to come home, it's her last day before she starts her paternity leave, the kids are all scrubbed and fed and ready for Ally.

In, she walks with a bunch of flowers and some chocolates from her mates, this, is one thing a fella will never get, you may get a pint from a mucker, but you will, never get birthday, Christmas or presents for the baby from a guy, it's a bit gay to be honest, but would it kill them to remember my birthday!!!!....Sorry....We feed the girls their bottles, they're smelling all, babyfied, read them a story, then off to bed they go. Jess settles into her "groovy chick" duvet, wriggling to get comfy, Ally bends over gives her a kiss, "night, night, babes, love you"........."FUCK BOLLOCKS ma".....


to be continued.........

Sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop...............

Summer is here at last, so me and the family piled into the bluemobile and headed off into the distance, towards the beach, if, you haven't any children, let me explain the, sheer scale of a trip, long gone, are the days, of just getting up and going, long gone, are trips, that you, are interested in, you have to find a place where, a) the kids will enjoy. b) there's both, indoor and outdoor activities and, c) don't, cost the earth, which, initself is a hard thing to find, as most places charge for young ones.
You, also, have to pack everything, from nappies, to clean clothes, to snacks, to winter clothes, rain coats, summer clothes, then you have to pack some toys, so the little bleeders don't get bored, some days we don't leave the house until mid day.

So, anyway, off we pop toward Lyme Regis, this little sea side resort is about, a hour and half away, as we speed off, at a nerve wrenching 26 miles a hour some blokey type band called westlife is blaring out some drivel about flying without wings, I'll give them fooking flying without wings in a minuet, we avoid all major roads, as the missus don't do motorways. The sun is beaming down on us, my little, fat lilly white, left arm is glowing red with the suns rays, Westlife are no more, the CD is splattered across the road, along with a dead badger, what, a perfect day. I'm getting excited now, sun, sea and ice cream, just a few moments away, we drive around a corner, down a ditch, up the hill, around another corner, rip a wing mirror off a car as we sped by, down a hill into fog !!!!! ......Yes, fooking fog, we ditched Bristol, where it was, a sunny day to drive for a hour, into fog......My little round face crumpled, like, a fat chick eating a celery stick, but, we continued onward, it might pass, oh no it didn't, as we entered Lyme, Fooking, Regis, the temperature dropped ....... A lot.... I, stood, in the car park, in a short sleeved shirt and shorts freezing my barnacles off, it was so cold when you breathed out a plume of steam popped out !!!! ...... "This is why we have to pack for every eventuality" my missus blurted, fooking - winter conditions and, not only had it dropped to minus fook knows what, the whole, bloody place was awash with fooking hairy arsed builders .......Yes, the entire town was a massive building site they're redeveloping the promenade, the grassy bits leading to the car park....Fooking great...... The whole town is a building site ......

It can only get better, or, so they say so, determined to have a good time off we set, my missus wrapped in a coat, trousers and a fleecy top, the kids in winter clothing, me, the nobber, dressed in summer attire, shivering, chins a quivering, the first port of call, a loo, the missus takes Jess in. I try and fail to get the double buggy into the gents. I can't carry her in, I need both hands to hold my beastie !!!!! I wish, not in this cold anyways!!!!! Nor, can I leave her outside, I must admit I did think about this, but decided not to in the end, so no pee pees for me.

If you have ever walked along a seaside resort pushing a double buggy you'll know how difficult it is, the paths are narrow, people are stood gazing into the sweet shops as if they've never seen a stick of rock before (what, the fook is rock anyhows, does anyone like it???) now, add scaffolding, a town, full of 90 year old northeners, - deaf 90 year old northeners - with zimmerframes, a bunch of diggers, dumpers and ditches, whilst its raining, oh yes, there was even a little drizzle, oh the joys of British summertime.

I've been there a few times, so has Ally and, we know the lay out of the town and a few shops, chip shops, enough to get us around, well today was, pick a fooking dilly, half the streets where closed due to construction works, the other half was jammed packed full, of wrinkley, old folks with badly fitting wigs, stinking of piss and doing 1/2 mile a hour, all jabbering loudly about how Noras dead and their latest illness, then - oh ba jeeezzzzus, they spot us, well, I say us, they spot Shannon, that's it they're crowding around like a bunch of vultures. Shannon, loves the attention, she's smiling and being all cutesy, the grinning grannies start tapping each others shoulders, "oh look Mavis she smiled" - "wind" I reply, "oh how cute she looks just like you" - "she's not mine" I reply. I think they get the hint and fook off, going into a charity shop or other such shop to buy more flowery dresses and brown shoes probaly dead Noras old shite. I know they fought in the war, and, their bodily functions ain't what they used to be and one day, I'll be that age, if I'm lucky, but, for the love, of all that is holy, stop buying trousers, where the waist is by your neck and ladies, if, you have to bend, whilst wearing the flowery dresses, bend ya fooking knees, I don't want to see what you had for breakfast, nor does the rest of the world and would it kill you to pluck or shave occationaly??.... Thank you.

It's, about half two now and I'm getting a wee bit hungry, well, I could eat a scabby horse to be honest, we know there's a decent chippie around the corner, a bag of chips and a walk along the sea front British tradition - fookers shut, and so is the next one, and, the one after that, and, the one after that, we see a fella with a bag of chips and ask him, where did you get them, the look on his face, as two fatties came stomping over with hunger in their eyes was sheer terror, over there he pointed quickly, turning and scurrying away with his fish 'n' chips........We're fooking off, smoke's coming off the wheels as we hit 20 miles a hour, grannies or not, we plough through the gaggling grannies, pull up outside the chippie, with a squeal of tyres, out of breath we ask for 2 portion of chips - we're outta chips, sorry I can do you a pie..... A fooking pie, you can shove the pie, up, your fooking arse. I want me chippies.....I look at Ally, no thanks we'll go elsewhere, a chip shop that don't do chips, well I never.

We walk along the sea front and peer over the wall, a picturesque view, of diggers, dumpers and arses, meet our gaze.

I spy a shop, a sandwich shop, outside, on a shit splattered blackboard, write in bright yellow chalk, crab sandwich, hmmmm. I decide, that'll do for now, I wait ouside as Ally and Jess enter the shop, some old duffers are sat in the hazy rain looking at a building site, eating ice cream when, down swooped a gull and nicked their ice cream, even here grannies get mugged, shouts of "I don't believe it" ring out, that's it now, Noras death is put on hold, whilst the whole gang discuss Veras ice cream theft, jabbering away, did you see that, well I never, ohhh, mmmm, weeellll, tututututut,.....Not, once did anyone of them, get of their fat, saggy arses and get, nor offer poor Vera another ice cream, mind you, poor bloody Vera, could have, got her own, sodding ice cream....... I bet, the story is getting bigger and better by the day, they told their mates and families, well, anyone that'll listen, how eight youths, with knives, came on the promenade causing trouble and, how they fought them off, but Vera was badly cut in the fracus....... It gave them a story to tell at Christmas' and birthdays so good luck to 'em.

Ally emerged from the gloomy shop, sandwich in hand, I grabbed it off her, then off, we fooked before, the galloping gulls, had it away, after, the first bite, I'd wished they had, it was disgusting, the girls had a pasty, the lucky gits.

We walked toward the harbor, avoiding the masses of mong children, that stood in the way, I think they were dribblers to be honest, so not their fault, the harbour is nice, full of fishing nets and boats - hardly suprising really to find boats in a harbour!!!! On the way back we stopped and brought some fish, freshly caught this morning - bloody fish, how expensive, then we popped into the pub garden for lunch, and by god was that worth the wait, well no to be honest, it was fooking rank, the spiral cheesy chips were, a congealed mess of crap, the sandwich, I ordered was supposedly beef and onion, it was more like barf and bunion, but it filled a gap, washed down with 2 pints of warm flat cider, oh fooking hell.... Does it get any better.

Well, after this big crock of crap we headed back toward the car, time had passed us by and it was getting late the kids were getting tired and I was getting bored so off we popped.

As soon as we left Slime Penis, the sun was out, the birds were tweetting.......... Never again, well until the next time anyway...........

A working progress.......Hope you enjoy.