Phew what a scorcher it's been.
Well as I sit here writing this I suddenly realise we have only 3 days, oh my god, 3 fooooking days.
It seems unreal. Then, all being well, we'll have another little Basher running around, eating, shitting and destroying everything in it's path. I say it because we still don't know what it'll be, my money is on a girl - again. Not disappointed don't get me wrong because the ones I have already are little - fuckers !!! Sorry little angles. As long as it's mine I'll be happy !!!!!!
The problem is we're running out off names - we try and pick names that will suit them through out their lives, you can't have a ninety year old woman called Star, nor can you have a baby called Agatha.
As well as finding a name for all ages we have to consider the rhymes, sticky Vicky, bendy Wendy, Anna the guana, smelly Kelly with a big fat belly, Lynn the bin who drinks gin and Kerry who is a short, fat, hairy fairy, so on so forth.
We also have to have the names which roll of the tongue but don't want it to roll to much - Sally Sander is just wrong.
And it has to go with the surname it'll be borderline abuse is you call the child Jack Keeler - no -might as well call him Frank Stein !!!
The other problem is finding a name that suits the person, I think of Emma as a blonde name, Carly as a dark name, Rosemary (which is just wrong) is definitely a ginge - oh the unfortunate ones - the gingers !!!! - Gods gonna get me for that one.....and change little eggbert into a ginger.
The other thing we consider is the "famous" names. I like the name Kylie but can't call the you un that because of the little aussie singer Minogue same as Bette - although I personally don't like the name but have ran out of examples, but again you get the idea.... Oh just though of another, no gone again, no it's back Robbie - that'll do.
And lastly we have to sift throught the names of people we know you can't have 2 children with the same name in the same family apparently I like thename Abigail but have a cousin called that so that's off the menu and ontop of all this you have to eliminate all the names that remind you of tossers, smelly people and the socially unexceptable no not gingers again but your mass murderers, kiddie fiddlers, rapist, politicians, biblical names, so what are you left with........Bob, that's what........ Fucking Bob - he who floats.......